Survivors Guilt
by rlb190
Summary: It's not up to us, to know why we survived. Sometimes it's not up to us to decide things. Sometimes people die. Sometimes people live. It's not up to anyone to pick their destiny. But we were gifted with these powers, and we're going to use them. Co-writer, kaynee!
1. Chapter 1

**Hi guys! It's rlb190! Yes, another story, but this time, I have a co- writer! It's kaynee!**

_**Hello! I'm so excited to be a co-writer with rlb190. I really hope you guys feel the same. I promise to do my best for all of you.**_

**Great! So, the story is basically about meta humans got survived something, as you will read. So, enjoy! Kaynee's been great, so be sure to check out her story as well. It's going to be a great story!**

_**This is going to be a fun story!**_

**Vivi Allen**

Kid Flash. Wally West. Bart Allen. Iris West. It's a legacy. It seems that sometimes there can be a glimmer of hope. Through these three, there has been suffering. There has been loss. There has been insanity. Yes, there has been insanity.

_Insane_. It's such a strange word. It has to do with the mind. The mind is a terrible and beautiful thing. It is both the creator, and destroyer, of sanity. Sense of judgment? Guilty or not guilty? Everyone is guilty. Death is never the end. And lightning always strikes twice.

That's my logic.

Sometimes, I wish that I could have just died and went to heaven like everybody else on that catwalk. I honestly wish I had died with everyone else. Survivors' guilt, I'd guess. Sometimes it's just so bad, I want to end it myself. I feel like Death has cheated me, not the other way around. How is it that I managed to live… while 15 others died?

It was a cold, windy day. We took a school trip to the nuclear power plant in Empire City. It was pretty boring, I remember. They let us walk on the catwalk with the tour guide. I remember her. She was blonde and overly-perky. Then the wires on one side of the catwalk broke. Maybe the wires were frayed or maybe someone cut them. Next thing I knew, we were falling.

I heard cracks and screams. Some had missed the toxic goo and fell right on the floor. I fell into some chemicals. It was bright green and smelled funky─ musty almost. I plunged in and blinked under the chemicals. It didn't hurt, but only for minute. Then a gut wrenching pain wracked my body and I was gasping and choking and clawing my way out of that metal container. I felt someone pull me out. I don't know… it was someone in black. I failed in their grip and they suddenly let go of me, as if something startled them.

I fell onto the cold floor. I heard sirens, and then everything went black. Then the part I dread most happened.

I saw a tunnel. And a light. I just needed that light so badly. I saw figures opening their arms to me. I needed the light, I craved it. I walked down the tunnel, towards the light. Suddenly, another figure appeared. He smiled at me, and then waved his hands as if to say "_Go away, you can't come yet."_ The tunnel grew further and further away. I stumbled, trying to reach that beauty. I fell back, and I was alone in the tunnel. I fell to my knees and cried. Why couldn't I go? Why couldn't I be in that light─ that beautiful, warm, welcoming light?

I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up and met someone. It was someone in red and yellow. His eyes sparkled, as if to say_, "I'm proud of you_." I just shook my head. "I can't, I can't." The figure nodded, still smiling.

Then I woke up.

I was in the hospital, they told me. 'Vivi, can you hear me? You're in a hospital. You were in an accident.' I was in an accident. That power plant. I felt very strange. Very… light. Dizzy and confused, I just shook my head. Over and over, they talked to me. They said that my dad was dead. I didn't know why he was, then they said that he was working in power plant when the catwalk broke. It didn't make sense to me, because he didn't work at the power plant. They said his brother was married to Dawn Allen before he died , who was Barry Allen's daughter. She agreed to take me in as a ward. My brain hurt as I tried to make connections. First Barry Allen was married to Iris West, and then they had Dawn, who was married to my uncle. How did that make me an Allen? Why did we have the same last name?

They talked to Dawn when she showed up. She was pretty when she came, like an angel, with golden hair and green eyes that were focused. They told her I PDSD, and was lucky to be alive. You're lucky, Vivi, you're lucky. No I'm not. I wish I was dead.

I left the hospital a week later. Then I discovered I could vibrate my molecules by accident. I was sitting in a chair and I dropped my fork, and it fell right through my leg. Dawn said that it was because of vibrating molecules. She told me about Barry Allen. He was, IS The Flash. THE ACTUAL FLASH. So, my Aunt's dad is the Flash.

Well, it threw me off guard.

Dawn said she'd help me to make sure I didn't go falling through chairs at school or something. I also noticed something strange. It seemed like I was aging slower, like everything slowed down. It turns out, Dawn is actually like 60, but she looks like 19 years old. She says speedsters age slower, the Gen 2 most of all. Gen 2 is short for generation 2, which means we are related to Gen 1. Or something like that.

I'm not really sure how I felt about it. Mostly scared.

And guilty.

I still feel guilty, to this day. My mind has slipped from me, I must admit. I feel… unhinged. That'd be the best way to describe it. I'm a door, which has no hinges. I'm there, and solid, but people just don't seem to know what to do with me. Dawn said I have Increased Perception and I'm fully a Speed Force Conduit, whatever that means. She said I can manipulate speed force so well that I can allow my friends or family members to run alongside me at equaled speeds. She also said since I can tap into the speed force fully, I can also steal speed from objects, animals, and even other speedies.

I also enrolled in school. I had no idea of the city name until Dawn told me the school name. Empire City Charter School. It goes from grades 6 to 12. So I was a newly powered, unhinged, meta-human freak, who had just moved to Empire City.

Aunt Dawn told me a few kids at school don't really like meta-humans. She says sometimes they are judged, so it'd be best for me to lie low on the whole "speed" thing. She told me to keep my powers under wraps, so to speak. I told her I'd tell the kids that my parents traveled a lot and I was going to be staying with her instead of going from school to school. She winked at me and said that was the best lie she had ever heard.

Apparently, she has never been lied to.

**Tess Reynolds**

I'm pretty sure things went sour pretty fast. You know, I'm an easy going girl. I laugh and smile and joke and all that other stuff, but behind this smiling mask, I'm so lonely. And you know what? Lemons stink.

You know the saying when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade? Well, SCREW THAT SAYING! Unless life gives you sugar and water, your lemonade is going to suck. It's better just to throw the lemons at people.

I hate lemons.

Honestly, I used to be addicted LSD. I might as well get that out now. A few others, but LSD was pretty bad. It's what happens when you get thrown out of your house at age10 because you cost too much money. You have nowhere to go, and you get picked up by a gang. After a bit, they trust you to be a lookout for deals, then you make the deals, then you use what the deal is about. You snort it, you take stamps, you inject it, anyway to go on a trip, to get that feeling. LSD was my main drug.

Each trip sent you to another world, sometimes; I really was Alice falling down the rabbit hole.

Then, I started this new drug, called Vertigo.

Vertigo is a narcotic that makes its users disoriented. It was dealt by a man known as "the Count". When injected directly into the blood stream while in its purest form, it affects the thalamus, where all the information from the pain receptors are collected. This then causes the victim to believe that he is excruciating pain. The effect lasts for days until the heart just gives up and stops.

Of course, I took it in pills.

It made me feel really high and happy. It was pretty much insane. Back then, I was insane too. I thought I would try it through injection in its purest form. And well… that was stupid. But instead of going through four days in extreme pain, it only lasted about five minutes. I just woke up, and poof, I was alive.

I might have called myself lucky, if I was a naïve person. Even a religious person would have referred to it as a miracle or a blessing. I like to think of it more as evolution.

Something happened when I woke up.

I should have died, I was told over and over again by several doctors. All logic backed their assessment. They speculated over possibilities, like a built up resistance or whatever. I knew they were wrong. They said it themselves, I should have died; anyone else would have. I had to repeat it to myself as if they hadn't told me enough.

**Sunny Cho**

Sometimes it not up to us to decide things. Sometimes people die. Sometimes people live. It's not up to anyone to pick their destiny.

But sometimes, it would be nice.

I had just noticed the electronic sign exclaiming "Safety First" and how many days the construction site had gone without an accident─ seventy four, in case anyone was wondering. That changed the moment I went looking for my mother. Disgruntled by having to wait in the car, I didn't think twice about getting out and going to her office. Maybe the fact that I was in a hardhat zone should have tipped me off, but even a hardhat wouldn't have been able to save me.

One probably heard it from a mile away; the intense rumbling and the sudden shouts of workers. That part gets me; if they hadn't been trying to get my attention, maybe I would have noticed what was going on. But they easily distracted me, as the sounds of worry and terror was clearly audible when their voices merged as one. I turned around, curious, because who wouldn't be?

It was all so quick. The time it took me to give the workers questioning looks as they furiously waved their hands about to finally realize what was happening felt like a lifetime, really. I felt my heart stop as I turned to look above me.

The crane had strangely lost its hold on quite a bit of steel beams. Or iron beams. I don't know; I couldn't tell the difference. But either way, those beams were headed straight down. There was no doubt that I would be out of its range─ I was going to be crushed.

I tried to let out a scream, but it caught in my throat. As if it would help, such as that of a hardhat, I raised my arms to shield myself. I finally got that scream passed my lips when I should have felt that impact. I don't really remember what happened, just the dust and overwhelming rattling sound, but I felt something.

A tingle, I guess, if I had to describe it.

I immediately fainted.


	2. Chapter 2

_Hey guys, kaynee here. Here's the first chapter! Hope you guys like it!_

**I'm so excited! All thanks to kay nee that you have such an awesome chapter! Be sure to check out her story, also based in Empire City! :D**

**Vivi Allen**

Exhaling, I stepped onto school grounds. Other students mingled with each other as I walked up the stone staircase and entered the large and probably beautiful, if in any other circumstance than the first day of school, building. I felt dread and nervousness starting to boil inside my stomach as the enclosed spaced enhanced the racket the students were making. Lowering my head, I started to walk, keeping my eyes on the map I had received the night before from one of the school counselors. I felt bad about that because my aunt had to take time off from work for me to get my schedule.

It felt like I had to walk forever and it felt even longer when I would glance up from time to time to find a random student staring at me like they knew I was the new girl.

Figures.

It was like I had a bright flashing neon sign behind me, although the fact that I had my face buried in a school map probably didn't do much in my defense either. I really hated this; it wouldn't even be an issue if I hadn't survived that fall back at the nuclear power plant.

Finally, I reached my locker. At least it looked shinny and didn't have any funky smells coming out of it. My books were already in there, luckily, as there were seven of them and they weighed more than I liked to carrying around. Aunt Dawn had bought me a new bag for the occasion, as well as other school supplies. Frowning, I shoved it inside the metal box. Things were going to get better, she had told me. Fat chance; I didn't want to have to deal with this. I shut the metal locker just as someone popped up behind me.

"Whoa!" I jumped. Someone raised her eyebrows next to me.

"Well hi to you!" She smiled at me.

"Oh, uh, hi." I muttered. She laughed.

"You're the new girl right? I'm Sun Gemma Kekoa Cho! But everyone calls me Sunny! Who are you?" She cocked an eyebrow.

"I'm Vivi Allen." She waved her hand with a book in it.

"Welcome to Empire City! You know, I heard that you live with Ms. Allen right?"

I nodded. "Yeah, she's my aunt."

Sunny smiled . "Oh cool! I wish I had an aunt in Empire City! You know what? That reminds me!" she laughed. "I totally forgot to do my math homework! Gotta go now! At least I'll be able to finish!" she waved to me and skipped away.

I stared at her. "Holy crap. How can she be so happy?" I muttered. The bell rang and I sighed once more. I wasn't going to like this.

The first couple classes went by rather slowly. They were boring and I didn't meet anyone new. As Aunt Dawn had advised, I kept my meta-human abilities to myself; none of these students looked like they would care if I had powers or not, but they didn't look like I actually would want to share a secret with them. I didn't risk it either way; the only thing worse than the first day of school as the new kid is the first day of school as the new kid that also happens to be a freak.

Around ten, there was a fifteen minute break period. I didn't much care for it; I would have preferred to skip it and get the next classes before lunch over with. The less time we spent goofing off, the quicker I can get out. And considering I didn't want to be there in the first place, it seemed like a pretty fair trade. However, as luck would have it─ and luck just loved to play practical jokes on me ─I would actually have to spend more time at school than I bargained for.

I remember how everyone in my hall suddenly got really excitable. There had been a group of rowdy kids, which was probably why. Everyone noticed them right off the bat with the commotion they were making. If I had been at this school longer, I might have known that they were probably the troublemakers. They started talking really loudly and shoving each other, and not in the "I'm-gonna-fight-you" way, it was more playful and to show how masculine they all were. Some masculinity… more like immaturity.

I noticed they geared up to run. I probably should have been doing the same, but like many other students in the hall, I was too curious to see what there were going to do. They shoved a random boy out of their group and with a smirk, he walked over to the wall, the same wall my locker was located on. Before I knew it, there was a heinously loud alarm echoing throughout the entire building. The boy and his friends instantly ran off. Too shocked by the blast, from both the alarm and kids just as surprised as it was, I stood. The sprinkler system even went off. I felt my hair dampen and start to stick to me as the doors to the nearest classrooms opened.

The teachers had probably heard the group of children daring each other to do something stupid before they ran off. I and a few other students had failed to move from the hallway of guilt─ a hallway so guilty, that anyone caught inside it was automatically so. I didn't like as one of the teachers pointed at me with a glare.

Detention.

**Sunny Cho**

Well, I wasn't in the hallway. Thank goodness for that, though! I still got in trouble for something not even related to that event. It involved this kid, Thomas Lundin, and this other girl, Mai Lee Rinekof. I wasn't expecting it, but then again, who was? I was doing some extra credit for science (which is hard for me, I mean, how the heck am I supposed to memorize that stuff?), and those other two were there with Mrs. Lee, the substitute science teacher. They were leaning over some chemicals and arguing.

"Listen Thomas! You can't mix those two!" Mai Lee said trying to pull a vial away. "Potassium permanganate is dangerous with ethylene glycol!"

Thomas shrugged. "Ah, well!" he pulled the vial back and poured both into the beaker. I looked up from my book work to watch it. Mrs. Lee looked up from the whiteboard.

"Thomas, what did you just mix?" She asked fearfully. Mai Lee looked at Mrs. Lee.

"Ethylene glycol and Potassium permanganate!" Mai Lee squeaked as she jumped away from the table. Mrs. Lee looked at the mixture in horror.

"Thomas! When you mix those two together, the potassium permanganate readily oxidizes the glycerol in an exothermic reaction that produces an…" Mrs. Lee stopped. "Everyone away from the table, now!" She turned her desk over spilling everything on the floor and got behind it. "Get behind the desk!" she ordered. Mai Lee, Thomas, and myself all raced and ducked under the desk as it started to smoke, then flamed up before exploding. Now, it wasn't a cartoon explosion, this one was light green and stunk. It rattled the lights and the smoke spewed everywhere. Mrs. Lee crawled to the filing cabinet behind her desk and pulled out some cloths.

"Put these over your faces! Ethylene glycol is poisonous!" As I put the cloth around my face, Mrs. Lee just shook her head. "You guys are so getting an F." she muttered through the rag.

I sighed and covered my ears as the fire alarm went off yet again.

**Journey Blake-Decamp**

I was immediately met with a sudden awkward and pointed silence as I walked into the restroom. The two girls that were in there stopped what they were doing, gathered closer together towards each other, and stared daggers at me. It was hard not to feel like I was intruding, but the restroom was for the use of students and I really needed to pee.

Other than the girls, the first thing I noticed was a distinct smell. And it wasn't the gross public restroom type of smell. What I smelled was strong, sorta musty, and made my throat burn. It fit hand-in-hand with the bathroom smell, really.

As I walked further into the lavatory, the girls began to walk away. Before I got to the stall, I noticed they stopped at the trashcan and toss something in. I didn't really get a good look, as they had also turned back and glared at me when they realized what I had just seen.

I did my business, uncomfortable as the smell was growing. I felt like plugging my nose, but I chose to wash my hands first. Personal hygiene and cleanliness and all. The cold water ran over my hands and after adding some soap, I looked at myself in the mirror. Shaking out my dyed-midnight-black hair, I watched the streaks of blue sway in the motion.

Finishing up as quickly as possible, I noticed the smell become a bit more rancid than before. I grabbed for some paper towels and dried my hands, wishing to get back to class as quickly as possible now and hoping the smell wouldn't stick to me. If that wasn't the case, I might've had to make a quick detour to my locker for some perfume. When I was satisfied with the state of my hands, I went to the trashcan, hoping that I would be able to find what the two girls had thrown in there out of curiosity.

As soon as I peered inside, however, I felt my heart stop.

"Oh my gosh, fire!" I shouted, realizing that what they had thrown in was cigarettes or something of that fashion. Crap, what do I do!?

I didn't really need to decide, as it turned out. The first alarm went off… for the third time that day. It was apparent the smell had migrated to nearby classrooms and the hallway outside because the door opened and in came the vice principal, who liked to walk around the school during the day to make sure everything was all right. Considering the day so far, she probably had her hands full.

The panicked state I was in probably screamed guilty, especially when she took one look at the flaming garbage bin then at me. I knew I was going to take the blame for it; such is the life of a teenager in high school.

Needless to say, I ended up with detention.

**Matt Keeva**

It was easy to see why the teachers were so irritated, considering the fire alarm had gone off three times earlier in the day, with only one of them being a false alarm. I heard around that they already busted someone for pulling that alarm─ a new kid, apparently.

Either way, the teachers were on edge from all the interruptions. That wasn't so good for me, although I was trying my best to pay attention.

There was this one girl─ Tess Reynolds ─that was a little less than prepared for the day of school. And as the teacher stood up at the whiteboard trying to teach, Tess was asking around for a pencil. No one wanted to give her one, based on the fact that they either did not have an extra one or didn't want to give it away and not get it back. It's not like they suspected her to steal it, but most people never gave them back.

Anyone could tell the teacher was clearly aware of the situation and was getting annoyed. You'd think she'd actually take the time to give Tess a pencil if she was so mad, but she didn't.

With no luck, Tess leaned forward and lightly tugged on my shirt's sleeve.

"Psst, hey. Do you have a pencil?" She asked. I sighed and did what no one else wanted to do.

"Here you go." I whispered, handing back the pencil. I felt it leave my fingertips as the teacher turned around. As soon as I saw her face, I realized I should have just stayed quiet.

"Mathew Keeva and Tess Reynolds, I've had enough of your talking. If you wish to waste class time, you can make up for it at detention. After school, today." She pointed to both of us with a slight glare.

My shoulders dropped, knowing full well she wasn't joking. As she turned to continue her lecture, Tess leaned toward me again.

"Thanks."

The teacher immediately turned around again. "Do you want to make it two days?"

"No, ma'am." I answered, throwing Tess a quick look. Hopefully she got the message to stop talking.

"Meanie." muttered Tess.

"Two days!" said the teacher.

"Tess!" I groaned. As if I didn't have enough on my plate. Tess gave me a shrug. I slapped a hand up to my face. This was just ridiculous.

**Thanks for reading! Review and tell us what you think **

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